Enjoy this write-up from THL Gesa of one of the Equestrian Challenges from the “A Kingdom for My Horse” equestrian event in June:

Fiona and Superman

Fiona of Hartstone and Superman, photograph by Sidney Green

Save the Baroness Hilderun!

Six noble riders braved the challenges posed by the Dragon horde accused of somehow kidnapping our dear Baroness Hilderun from the Debatable Lands and leaving only a faint image of her in effigy. At least that was what her distressed husband, Baron Brandubh, alleged when he sought the help of those noble dragonslayers.

As he explained, the riders would have to endure the thorny thickets, enter the flaming cave of the dragon, slay the King dragon, slay the Mother Dragon, slaughter all of the baby dragons, and dance in their blood.  If these tasks were accomplished, then the Baroness would be returned to the Baron.

The first noble riders set off with courage, chivalry, and enthusiasm to brave the challenge to slay all of the dragons, adults and cute little baby dragons alike, so that they might achieve the glory of returning the Baron’s beloved Baroness back to her rightful home.

First Victoria.  She did brave the thorny thickets, but failed to kill either the King or Queen dragons.  She did report that they were at best severely wounded and at least scared.  However, she was very efficient at slaying all of the cute baby dragons and trampled through their gushing blood with zest. This was apparently enough to break the spell, and the lovely Baroness was indeed found back by her Baron’s side.

Lord Nohaaj was also summoned by the Baron with the same pitiful, impassioned plea for help to find his missing Baroness. Nohaaj also struck out into the wilderness, thrashing through the thorny thickets and diving into the fiery cave on his brave war horse Maple. He was successful in killing the Dragon King, but merely offended the Queen dragon with a poorly placed spear and an insult about her bony appearance leaving no suitable target.  He wiped out the squealing and adorable baby dragons, and was shocked by the volumes of blood that pooled into the cave, with Maple trampling through the oozing blood. He returned to the Baron to find that his deeds were, if not perfect, enough for the Baroness to be found safe once again by her dedicated and concerned Baron’s side.

But, the Baron was forced to call out yet again for help, and another rider went valiantly up to perform the same challenge, for once again the Baroness had gone missing. Each respective rider performed honorably, and the Baroness would be returned. This process was repeated by Katja,  Fiona, and yet again by Catrina. Each time, dragons were slain and the wandering Baroness returned.

When the Baron called out for the sixth time that he needed a noble soul to slay dragons to help retrieve his beloved Baroness, John, riding the majestic Superman, another great war horse, started to question the Baron.  “Noble Baron” he queried, “Are you sure that the dragons are in fact the issue here?”  He continued, “Just thinking outside the box, maybe a moat, some castle guards, even an ankle chain, might help…?”

But nonetheless, despite his nagging doubts, the noble John set off with his warhorse Superman, to slay dragons and return the Baroness once more to the Baron’s side.  And he, too, was successful in driving the Dragon King to requiring therapy (PTSD from having so many errant spears chucked at him) scaring the Dragon Queen, and laying waste to the harmless, cute, defenseless, little baby dragons. Finally, he sloshed through their blood. Upon his return, he noted that the dragons seemed quite indifferent to the whereabouts of the Baroness, who happened to return to the baron’s side ONCE AGAIN, even though the required tasks were only partially accomplished. He observed that the dragon lair was a very large, spacious, and airy cave. He further noted that nowhere in his travels attempting to slay, and succeeding in scaring and abusing, these gentile creatures, did he notice any trace of the Baroness. He concluded: “Perhaps the noble Baron Brandubh should consider that the gentle dragons are not the cause of his beloved Baroness’ wandering tendencies, as alleged?!?”


Rider John recounts his quest to slay the dragons and rescue the Baroness

This shocking concept has caused the Baron to ponder the Dragons’ involvement, and indeed his beloved Baroness Hilderun’s story of alleged kidnapping. It is rumored that the Baron is planning another event to determine the truth. To be continued….